A light festival and the inner spark. (When to whirl your diverish)

Last night I was in a glorious little haven called Govinda's, it had a coi pond and was a krishna temple and they celebrated and danced and had marvelous food, some of which was totally not good for me and I was reminded why I am here to begin with. My journey in life has been to find the balance of extremes and I struggle regularly from having a very indulgent and wacky childhood, and yet it being very spiritual and now I find myself in a spiritual situations and feeling like I have come to a place of peace in my self but does that mean that I belong in community or that I am more comfortable as a beacon? I have lived as a monk for over 4 months now, and I find that as I am motivated to continue with my healing of all my wounds and share in the process with those of a similar path I am also amazed at how lack of consideration for the ordinary becomes so blaring in my ear. Today was another day after the Festival of light. The candles are blown out and the floor is swept and all things return but there was a moment where there was the blessing and we all held space for grace. And the divine maybe reaches out and touches you. Beyond your own frustrations and your falls there is just you and your daily practice...... do you eat well, do you take your body on a strea

ch, do you whistle while you work, do you smile like you mean it? Sure I sparkled at the festival of lights but I think that was the spark from with in and that is the eternal flame.

Ahoy Hoy where does the time go in a tiny town with nothing to do?

Seriously is it the end of October? Well I have celebrated my 4th month at the Tree here in Patagonia and it comes with more questions and even deeper resolutions. The power of companionship has been a big theme in my second round here, not only have I switched room but I have made a quality friend that is beyond my usual range and we are roomie and it is great to have some confidant and a golden girl that shares a similar view, about taking things in the more 80/20 direction, it make me nervous to accept something completely and not see it's faults and all. And I am starting to get more entwinded with what I want to do here and also I am feeling freerer to go and do what I am meant to. Of course the question is since I am getting better, and well there is a station here well then why do I want to leave. Companionship the same thing that links us all back to life ever unfolding is not what we would fight for but what we would live for which is love. I find that my creative expression gets focused on the wooing and my powers of making stuff go into making woo scenarios rather than developing battle anthems, it has never been truer than to simply say are you a lover or a fighter? Can you be both? I am finally going to make it on KPUP radio which is all I ever wanted to do since I first laid eyes on this little southern exposure town. I will post it as soon as I get my hot little hands on it. What else I love a great despacho ceremony and i finally did an enipi- native american sweat lodge. I've been feelin my roots more and not freaking out by the nature that I am a part of not inspite of. Can you Imagine.... Me? Well anyway I'm making progress on my health and every day I look for more challenge. Today I took the Mesa Trail. Next week who knows but I just keep at it and need to remember that even when I think that there is no more that there is something beyond, and that is the fabric of truth and worthiness when you are ready you do what is needed to be done and then you have what you need for the task at hand. Miracles are all around us as we are more and more open to the portal of Universal Expansion. So dream, dream big and be really honest doing it. You haven't the time to waste and why would you. you are your own obligations and rules and experiences. Whether you create conflict or have to much on your plate in order to feel more important you create the life you lead and I hope for everyone that they stop living out of their head and start living in their heart. I mean me of course but this seems to be a big "overcome" So here I go letting go again. deep breathe inhale exhale repeat.